If your future mother-in-law thinks you’re not suitable for her darling son or daughter, don’t shower her with gifts and compliments – stand up to her instead。
如果你的未来岳母或婆婆认为,你不适合她的宝贝女儿或儿子,别给她献一堆礼物和恭维之辞,而要与她对抗。
Scientists have found that the best way to win over future in-laws is to take an assertive approach and directly persuade them you will make your intended spouse happy。
It may seem counter-intuitive, but this tactic – dubbed the ‘I am right for your child’ approach – helped win over doubting fathers and mothers, a study found。
In his research paper, Professor Menelaos Apostolou said that children frequently choose mates who do not appeal to their parents。
在此研究报告中,迈内劳斯·阿珀斯特鲁教授称,孩子们时常选择不受家长(微博)喜欢的对象。
For instance, they may fall for individuals who are physically attractive, while their parents are more concerned with social standing and family background。
例如,他们会爱上一些外貌较好的人,但家长更关心社会地位和家庭背景。
The study of 738 Greek-Cypriots identified approaches that were most likely to be used to win over in-laws, which Professor Apostolou grouped into seven tactics。
First was the ‘I am right for your child’ tactic, in which suitors demonstrate to the prospective parents-in-law how good they are as mates for their children。
首先是“我最适合你的孩子”策略。追求者向未来岳父母/公婆展示,自己是多么适合做他们孩子的伴侣。
Following this came the ‘I do not deserve this!’ strategy, in which they demonstrate to their mate’s parents that they do not warrant their rejection。
接下来是“我不接受!”策略。追求者会向伴侣父母表现出,自己不接受他们的反对。
Third most common was the ‘Why don’t you like me?’ approach, in which suitors try to determine why the parents disapprove and try to change their minds。
最常见的第三种是“你为什么不喜欢我?”策略。追求者试图判断家长为什么反对,并试图改变他们的想法。
Other tactics include ‘No confrontation’ and ‘You have to accept the situation!’ in which they can threaten the parents by suggesting they risk never seeing their grandchildren。
The ‘I am right for your child’ and ‘No confrontation’ tactics were the favourites whereas ‘approach’ and ‘Tell them I am good!’ were least likely to be successful。